aunt_zelda | Recent Entries

What a year 2025 was. Horrible politics. Money stress. My mother broke her leg. My cat got sick. My grandmother died. My cat died. I got full-time employment again. I tried to treat my mysterious skin issues. I ran D&D at conventions for total strangers and had a great time. I had a health scare and got on new meds to treat it, and it worked. I adopted two kittens. I helped my mother move halfway across the country to live in the same city as me. I got better at communicating with my girlfriend.

My resolutions for 2025 were:
1) Restart therapy
2) Cooking lessons so I can cook dinner for my girlfriend more often
3) Go to the park/somewhere in nature alone regularly
4) Work on scripts, finish 2 by end of year
5) Find a hobby separate from my girlfriend
6) Connect with friends more often

1) I did for a while, and that was especially helpful through the first half of the year
2) This fell apart, due to a combination of things outside our control, me realizing the friend I'd hoped could teach me wasn't clicking as a teacher personally, and my own anxieties and avoidance. I did get pretty good at cooking twice a week for my girlfriend most weeks.
3) This didn't happen. I got out to kayak but not enough, and not alone.
4) This didn't happen.
5) This didn't happen.
6) This did happen, I watched tv shows with friends online, played more games in person and online, and put myself out there more. I didn't keep up with some friends as much as I would have liked to.

My 2026 Resolutions Are:
1) Learn to cook 20 recipes.
2) Find some kind of regular movement thing I can do consistently (swimming, dancing, swordfighting, martial art, generic exercise, walking in the park) once a week ideally.
3) Attend at least 3 conventions.
4) Get into making mocktails and cocktails (get supplies, make list, learn to make 10 different ones.)
5) Establish regular painting hangouts with friends to work on my Warhammer miniatures.
6) Watch at least 52 movies.

( Read more... )

Luna was a wonderful cat. She was brave and kind and curious. She watched over me when I was sick, comforted me when I was sad, made me laugh on difficult days. She was never scared of vacuums. She got jealous during my therapy sessions. She liked jazz music. When the pandemic started she was happy I was home every day. She witnessed fires, earthquakes, tornado warnings, and blizzards. She moved with me twice, first across town and then across the country. Routinely she would yell at me that it was time for bed. She insisted on grooming my arms after I showered. Almost every night she would sleep curled up against me.

It's only been two days and I miss her so much.

2024 was ... not great for me at times.

First, my job got increasingly more and more stressful. My bosses jerked me around, messed with my head, and then ultimately let me and several other employees go in the summer due to the dip in business. I'd worked there for nine years. Nine. Years. I got the job right out of college.
I knew I had to leave that job. I knew it was bad for my mental health. I saw others leave. I was the longest-term employee by the end. But I couldn't find my way out. This was probably for the best, but it still hurts. I let that job define me for so long.

Unemployment was not great. I needed time to recover from burnout but increasingly worried about money. I landed a part-time job that has been weirdly wonderful for my mental health. I have to go in to an office again, but it's not bad. It feels good to be able to leave work when I clock out, it doesn't follow me. I still have nightmares about my old job and my old bosses. I'm grappling with a lot of shame about my career, leaving LA, figuring out who I even am after so many years being invested in the entertainment industry.

I took care of a lot of health issues I'd been putting off or hadn't realized were so bad. I was in dire need of Vitamin D. I took physical therapy for issues with my foot and lower back and saw strong improvements. I had severe sleep apnea and didn't realize until my sleepiness during the day was starting to worry me, so now I sleep with a mask. I don't need naps most days anymore! I have more energy. I can wake up more easily in the morning.

My girlfriend and I got into two big hobbies this year: kayaking and Warhammer. Fortunately my girlfriend already had a lot of gear for kayaking. Getting out into nature was wonderful for me! I got stronger and my endurance improved. Warhammer is an expensive hobby, but we're finding ways to cut costs, finding good deals, buying used, and learning about crafting terrain with junk.

I wrote more. I made new friends. I dived into new and old fandoms.

The politics ... well that was horrible. Absolutely horrible. I'm worried. Will we have to move, for our own safety? Will I be able to get married someday? Friends are talking about even leaving the country entirely.

All in all I'm glad to see 2024 go. It was a tough year. Some good stuff, but plenty I'm happy to be moving away from.

My Resolutions for 2024 were:

1) Run more games, including some in person
2) Cook more meals
3) Find something active to do consistently (i.e. walking, martial arts, dancing)
4) Paint minis
5) Finish a script

1) I did run some games, but only one was in person
2) I did some of this, but not nearly enough
3) I succeeded in this, kayaking a ton over the summer and fall
4) I started airbrushing because I got into Warhammer in a big way in the second half of the year
5) I didn't do this

My Resolutions for 2025 are:

1) Restart therapy
2) Cooking lessons so I can cook dinner for my girlfriend more often
3) Go to the park/somewhere in nature alone regularly
4) Work on scripts, finish 2 by end of year
5) Find a hobby separate from my girlfriend
6) Connect with friends more often

( Read more... )

Western movie marathon this weekend and excuse me why did Tuco get labeled "the Ugly" he's just ... a guy? Tumblr would call him "skrunky" but like there's a charming kind of affection in that sort of label.

Also if my partner of multiple high stakes cons suddenly dumped my ass in the desert, still tied up, without my cut of the money for the last con? Of course I'd be furious!
Justice for Tuco. He deserves his revenge.

When Clint Eastwood's character gets unjustly hanged and betrayed, his mission to seek vengeance paints him as the heroic protagonist. But when I, Tuco Benedicto Pacífico Juan María Ramírez ...

2023 was the year I left LA after about 8 years. It was a major life change. I loaded up my stuff into a shipping crate (U-Pack is the best for long distance moves) stuffed my car to capacity, and got sedatives for my cat Luna. I said goodbye to my first ever local game store, many friends, and the Pacific Ocean. I said goodbye to the worst traffic and the best fresh fruit I've experienced in my life. I embarked on a journey with my poor cat in the backseat, heading for Indianapolis and my girlfriend.

Living with my girlfriend has been wonderful! I've missed being domestic with a partner, and it feels right to be doing that again. Communication issues are to be expected, and we're working through them. Most of our problems seem to come down to "I care you!" "I care YOU!" and struggling to communicate that to the other person properly.

Being in a house with one person, after sharing apartments with friends for the past 8 years (12 years if we go back through college) has been strange. While I appreciate my privacy at times, I really miss the convenience of living with other people. I miss the companionship. It's too easy to get stuck staying at home, too tired and daunted by the prospect of leaving the house to make a move.

Some especially stressful things happened this year. I sought a new therapist with difficulty in the new health care system. I miss my LA therapist very much, but I think the new one will be ok for now. I'm working on making peace with certain things I can't control, and being supportive to the people I love as best I can.

Some habits have changed that I'm ok with (weed usage), some have changed that I'd like to change back (TV watching time), and some I'm still figuring out (playing Baldur's Gate 3, my first major video game ever.)

A lot happened this year, but I got through it all. Huge life changes happened and overall I've rolled with them. And now, here comes 2024 ...

( Resolutions )

3) Run more TTRPGs (not just D&D either)

4) Make more time for reading

5) Maintain a garden

6) Find something active to take up as a hobby (ideas: dancing, martial arts, kayaking)

1) This did not happen.

2) This did happen! I joined a class, painted some paintings, and had a grand time.

3) This didn't really happen. I did run a Lasers & Feelings hack at one point, but that's about it. I let my D&D games fall by the wayside during the year.

4) This happened! I read a few books, all good, and have added some very cool ones to my shelf to read in the future. More outings means more time to read in the parking lot!

5) This was a roaring success! I grew massive tomato plants, a surprisingly productive cucumber plant, and some herbs. For 3-4 months I didn't need to buy any tomatoes, I could just pick them from the garden. I hadn't grown stuff in this way since I was a kid in school so this was very exciting for me.

6) This did not happen. The move was a lot, settling was a lot, some personal stuff happened later in the year. It's easy to get stuck in a rut, and I got stuck. That's ok though.

~*~

My Resolutions for 2024 are:

1) Run more games, including some in person

2) Cook more meals

3) Find something active to do consistently (i.e. walking, martial arts, dancing)

4) Paint minis

5) Finish a script

( Read more... )

Finally saw Hadestown live last night and it was incredible! Sobbed with my girlfriend, holding her hand so tight.

Forgot to warn my girlfriend how hot Hades as a character is and uhhhh welp, I welcome the new hyperfixation to our lives XD

And like, look, I've loved every cast member since the original concept album. THAT SAID ... Matthew Patrick Quinn's Hades might be my favorite Hades? His voice. Goes. SO DEEP.  All Hades performers are going for Leonard Cohen with a bit of Tom Waits gravel. Quinn did, but he also made it something new.  .. dare I say a bit of a classic Disney villain style? In the best way! The smug "oh, it's about me!" aside to the audience as Orpheus starts. The lanky prowling around the stage. The lingering looks at Eurydice and Persephone.

Maybe I'm biased because this is my first time seeing the show live but ... idk. Overall the tour cast felt a lot more soulful, more gritty, than the Broadway cast (whom I adore!) I hope they release a proper recording of this cast, I know that's rare but I can dream.

( Read more... )

Snuff - Strangulation

Possessive Behavior

Monster uses powers or abilities to rescue a human

Inexperience - Sexually Inexperienced Monster

Human offered as sacrifice to monster

Examining Body Turns Intimate/Sexual

Heat/Rut (A/B/O optional)

Breathplay

Careful Sex Required as a Result of Size/Anatomy Difference

Hazel/Moon: got a bit obsessed with this last year on tumblr and that has not gone away. Their complicated dynamic is just so intense to me. Hazel's seemingly unending trauma, especially when he's hanged almost to death for desertion, is something I'd love to see explored. Moon's struggles with human limitations and needs would also be great. She's so very much NOT human and I love how eerie she can get.

- - -

Rogue One
Fandom-Specific DNWs: permanent death of Bodhi Rook.
Additional Tags:

Breathplay

Heat/Rut (A/B/O optional)

Inexperience - Sexually Inexperienced Human

Noncon - Multiple forced orgasms

Noncon--Human Raped by Monster

Phallic Tentacles

Possessive Behavior

Predator Decides Prey is Too Interesting to Kill

Tentacle Sex

Bor Gullet/Bodhi Rook: I remember being in the theater and their scene coming up and I was so stunned. Somehow, tentacle porn, in a Star Wars movie, all of the sudden? Ok then! Criminally underutilized by the fandom in my opinion. Would love to see more of that scene, or alternate takes or meetings, or a continuation later on.

- - -

Discworld
Fandom-Specific DNWs: noncon or death of the requested characters.
Additional Tags:
blood drinking (consensual)

Character A is a reluctant vampire who doesn't want to drink from Character B but has no choice

Character ashamed of their monstrous urges and needs

Danger Kink - Fangs and/or Claws Against Vulnerable Skin

Gentle Cuddling with a Nonuman Partner

Heat/Rut (A/B/O optional)

Inexperience - Sexually Inexperienced Human

Monster uses powers or abilities to rescue a human

Possessive Biting

Sex to help fight other violent urges

Vampire Blood Drinking is Erotic

Otto von Chriek/Sacharissa Cripslock/William de Worde: One of my favorite OT3s. Please, literally anything, I will read it.
I'd love to know how they get together, who hits on whom first, is a third approaching a couple, do they all fall together after a late night on a breaking story? I love how the book shows us all of them paired off and then together, the dynamics at play that differentiate. I love how Otto and Sacharissa keep William grounded when he gets too bigheaded, how William and Sacharissa defend Otto, and how Otto and William deal with his father.
If you're up for smut, I'm not at all opposed to Black Ribboners being allowed to nibble their partners in bed. In fact I think that would be really lovely to explore the trust involved in that.
Very much interested in Otto relapsing, or having to rescue one or both of them from scoundrels outraged over the latest newspaper story and getting a bit carried away.

- - -

The Magnus Archives
Fandom-Specific DNWs: Permanent deaths of any of the requested characters, except Elias. Jon saying he is allosexual or gay.
Additional Tags:
Bitemarks/Scratches/Marks

Breathplay

Gunplay

Character forced into magic binding ritual

Heat/Rut (A/B/O optional)

Monster Trying To Corrupt Human

Noncon - Multiple forced orgasms

Possessive Behavior
Possessive Biting

Ritual Sex

Sex to help fight other violent urges
Dark Magic
Feral Behavior

Annabelle Cane/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist: They are fascinating to me. Such powerful, destined characters, circling each other for so much of the show's run. I'd love to read more about them interacting, in the timeline or in a What If. Honestly, what if Jon became an Avatar of the Web instead? What if Annabelle was a spy within the Archives? Feel free to get into Annabelle's and Jon's compulsion powers and what it might feel like to use them on each other. Feel free to make Annabelle and/or Jon even more monstrous than in canon.

Jack Barnabas/Agnes Montague: It's just one episode, but "Burning Desire" really stands out to me. Agnes trying to live a "normal" life for a time, with this guy Jack. What if things had gone differently, and she'd kept seeing him? What if she hadn't died when she did? What if the burning kiss turned Jack into an Avatar himself? What if they'd found a way to be together without touch?

Elias Bouchard/Melanie King

This is complicated. I was trying to work this out and came up with "the 70s horror appeal of an abused woman lashing back at her abusive boss and raping him at knifepoint but like he enjoys it too much and it's really weird." If that makes sense to you, great! If not, don't worry, I have more words:

I want Melanie to have her vengeance. I want her to get back at him. I'm real mad she wasn't there to see him arrested. I'm real mad she didn't get to stab him. I feel like Elias enjoys women hurting him way too much, maybe play that out a bit? Maybe they have a messed up, dark, deeply unhealthy relationship while she protects the Institute and he tries to steer into more of a Slaughter Soldier type. Maybe he can compel statements about her sex life and kinks, either to humiliate her or turn her on or enrage her. Maybe she has just enough Eye powers to turn that back on him for a change and drag out all the disgusting things he thinks about all day. Love the idea of her making him suck her fingers, her boot, her knife, anything to stop his lying tongue. Also remember for all his posturing, Elias snapped and beat a man to death with a pipe and called it an "overreaction" he's got violent rage going on too. You could really lean on the corporate horror of all this, the paperwork, contracts, reviews, disciplinary measures, etc.

My super self indulgent guilty pleasure concept: Melanie pins him down with a knife and fucks him in his office chair. And she's not fussed about him getting hurt in the process.

If you're the type who likes music while you write, I've made a few fanmixes for them: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5oUzUQdRoGTEpavGiJEYXU https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2gOlqBCqZ2AVVXEo60PjMV https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4w6ud12TLG2AngeuFRRg64

Agnes Montague/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist

I'm super intrigued by these two characters. They have a lot in common and not much opportunity to talk about their own issues. I would love to see them meet somehow, perhaps the soulbond with Gertrude managed to save Agnes from death, or the world ending brings her back? Or an AU where Agnes is still lurking around and feels herself drawn to Jon now that he's the Archivist? Will she help burn down the Archives, or will she need convincing? Feel free to lean WAY into the dark religious implications of Agnes especially if you're comfortable with that.

These are two characters who've both died in canon in a way, how do they feel about rough sex, about relative immortality? What does that soulbond feel like when they touch? If you're the type who likes music while you write I made a fanmix for them: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1EsystQZIbp7i74iEkEYp7

Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist/Alice "Daisy" Tonner
Trevor Herbert/Julia Montauk/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist
Basira Hussain/Alice "Daisy" Tonner

Werewolves werewolves WEREWOLVES! Go WILD with this! Hunting each other down in the woods! Heats! Biting! Using sex to cope with murdery feelings! All the consent issues! let. them. FIGHT. Or fuck. Or hunt together! Or hunt each other! Maybe Daisy's struggling with her urges and has violent sex to try and stave it off. Or she gives in and then regrets it, blood still warm on her lips. Or they team up in the apocalypse to survive. Or they end up together in a What If and are hunters together in England from the show's start. I'd love to know more about Trevor and Julia's relationship, hunts, dynamic. I don't personally see them as father/daughter but if you wanna lean into the implications there by all means go right ahead, I'll read it.

For the moresomes pairings ... Werewolf pack! Maybe Hunt avatars go into heat and Trevor kidnaps Jon to satisfy Julia, since he's been struggling to keep up with her lately. Pie in the sky, dreaming big ... I'd love for Jon to get kept by this pack. Trapped in a cuddlepile of murderers where he feels safe, so long as he doesn't try to leave of course. If he tries to leave, they'll run him down.

- - -

The Witcher - All Media Types
Fandom-Specific DNWs: noncon or death of the requested characters.
Additional Tags:

witcher potions cause monstrous transformations

Rough sex - Monster leaves bruises and scratches with fangs/claws

Possessive Behavior
Possessive Biting

Enhanced Senses

Feral Behavior

Consensual Gangbang

Human offered as sacrifice to monster

Danger Kink - Fangs and/or Claws Against Vulnerable Skin

Bitemarks/Scratches/Marks

Breathplay

Geralt of Rivia/Eldritch Abomination!Emhyr Var Emreis: was super taken by this pairing when I saw it nominated. Up for full consent or dubious circumstances between these two. I'm not super well versed in the lore so feel free to set it whenever or in a complete AU timeline.

Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg: ah, a beloved OT3. I'm down for Witcher physiology being weirder than in canon, Yen having some interesting shenanigans going on, or Jaskier getting cursed or suddenly having nonhuman lineage that pops out all of the sudden, or a mixture of all of that. I'm not super well versed in the lore so feel free to set it whenever or in a complete AU timeline.

Jaskier | Dandelion/Witchers: my needs here are simple. Ravish. That. Bard!
Which Witchers? Whichever you fancy! Feel free to invent OCs and fling them into the party too!

- - -

Hello from the Hallowoods
Fandom-Specific DNWs: noncon or death of the requested characters (dubious consent is ok.)
Additional Tags:

Bitemarks/Scratches/Marks

blood drinking (consensual)

character A has gone feral and character B tries to bring them back to themselves... with sex

Character ashamed of their monstrous urges and needs

Tentacle Sex

Possessive Behavior
Possessive Biting

Heat/Rut (A/B/O optional)

Monster Expects to be Hurt; Treated Gently Instead

Vampire Blood Drinking is Erotic

Touch-Starved Nonhuman

Nikignik/Danielle O'Hara: Their meeting in Season 1 was brief but very interesting to me. How many such people has Nikignik met over time? What does Danielle's future hold? What if they met in a different time and place?

The Countess/Yaretzi: This is self-indulgent of me but like, come on. Werewolf and Vampire! Mutual interest, tension, teeth for biting, long lives and much to discuss.

Polly/Yaretzi: They're such a strange pair, and I've been drawn to them from the start. The devil and the ancient werewolf. Locked into promises with each other and forming a strange kind of family with Mort. I'd love to read like, anything for them? Especially if they start trying to be intimate together and explore their potential with each other.

Ricou Chapman/Nolan Thair: These two are just so sweet. I wanna know more about how they met, how they work out their relationship together, their varying issues of their bodies and senses of self. Perhaps one night something comes out of the lake? Or a stranger at the hotel makes trouble for them?

- - -

Original Work (Dubious Consent preferred)
Fandom-Specific DNWs: permanent deaths of any of the requested characters, except the scientist.
Additional Tags:

Rough sex - Monster leaves bruises and scratches with fangs/claws

Tentacle Sex

Noncon - Multiple forced orgasms

Possessive Behavior
Possessive Biting

Predator Decides Prey is Too Interesting to Kill

Feral Behavior

Gangbanged by Monsters

Inexperience - Sexually Inexperienced Human

Inexperience - Sexually Inexperienced Monster

Heat/Rut (A/B/O optional)

Female Mad Scientist/Nonbinary Overworked Assistant/Nonbinary Vengeance-Seeking Creature: I nominated this one. I'm so weak for this dynamic. Long suffering assistant(s) in love with eccentric boss, I can't help it, I love it. Perhaps some experiment goes kinky? Perhaps they make it go kinky? Go as campy or serious as you like with this. Perhaps the Creature wanted vengeance and has been mollified with offers of kindness and love. Perhaps the Scientist is disgraced for refusing to give up the Creature to their former colleagues for study.

Stolen Human Raised By Faeries/Changeling Raised By Humans: This is one I keep nominating in various exchanges in the hopes of seeing it written.
I'm very into the game lore for Changeling: The Lost but don't feel beholden to that at all if you aren't familiar.

Trans Man Put in the Stocks Overnight/Group of Monsters Who Find Him: Ah, the old "sexy stocks punishment" set up. I gotta admit this compels me every time I see it in an exchange. What sort of monsters? Anything that strikes your fancy and isn't in my DNWs. I'm partial to werewolves and tentacle beasts personally but don't feel limited by that, the world is full of monster lore and this man in the stocks is there ALL NIGHT.

Nymph/Pack of Werewolves: I love werewolves and I especially love packs of werewolves and I particularly love packs of werewolves sharing a lucky lady around or lavishing her with attention. (Not all the werewolves have to be male btw, any genders welcome and encouraged.) I like the idea of them meeting in the woods perhaps during Midsummer and the energy in the air causing an orgy, or perhaps the nymph's got access to some sex pollen that makes the werewolves go wild for her. Dubious consent is very much welcome here, I'm down for some ravishment, or even something more intense and rough.

Warrior Prince/Demonic Queen he's In a Politically Arranged Marriage With: I love the potential here for a Queen who looks perfectly average on the surface, but in the bedroom shows a very different form. Or a Queen who looks exquisitely demonic at all times and the Warrior Prince knows just what he's in for from the get go. How willing he is to be in this arranged marriage, and what's on the line if he displeases his

Multispecies Band of Female Adventurers/Captive Male Drow: Yes yes, D&D lore around the Drow is inherently very problematic. Let's eroticize it here though. Feel free to build the party however you please, though I'm a big fan of size difference in D&D parties. Would love to see some bondage of their captive, and use of fun toys picked up during their adventures. How willing or not the captive is, I leave up to you.

- - -

Original Work (Consent)
Fandom-Specific DNWs: noncon or death of the requested characters.
Additional Tags:

Bitemarks/Scratches/Marks

blood drinking (consensual)

Danger Kink - Fangs and/or Claws Against Vulnerable Skin

Feral Behavior

Inexperience - Sexually Inexperienced Human

Inexperience - Sexually Inexperienced Monster

Touch-Starved Nonhuman

Vampire Blood Drinking is Erotic

Gargoyle/Parkour Enthusiast: I can't remember right now if I nominated this or suggested it to a friend, but either way I can't get the concept out of my head. Is the Parkour Enthusiast seeking out gargoyles on purpose, or was this a shock to them? When's the last time the Gargoyle felt compelled to move so quickly?

Post-Apocalyptic Mutant Who Just Wants To Be Loved/Surly Human Scavenger Grudgingly Charmed By Them: Honestly, I'd watch this romcom and love it. Would love one or both of them to be sexually inexperienced, and gently exploring with their new partner.

Werewolf in Rut/Enthusiastic Vampire Who Offers to Stay With Them: now this is just a fun set up. Are they an established couple, friends, or newly acquainted? Does the vampire have some experience with this situation?

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aunt_zelda

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Hope Rides Alone

I only regret that I have one life to give for Whalebone Lane!

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