Coming Out Day
Oct. 11th, 2019 12:07 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
aunt_zeldaToday marks the two year anniversary of my finally accepting the reality of things and settling down with "asexual."
I feel so much better for it. It was a frustrating process and I'm glad to be on the other side of it.
I know labels aren't for everyone, but I find them comforting for myself and my identity. I need an anchor to tether me.
Bit fuzzy on the gender thing lately. The prospect of yet another lengthy journey of self-discovery just exhausts me at this point. "None gender, left female" kinda started as a joke but that feels more right than wrong. So does "agender" and so does "demigirl."
Not sure how much of my gender presentation is tangled up with having to present uncomfortably femme at work, overall societal pressures, my hormone imbalance, and who I actually am as a person deep down.
It increasingly feels like a costume I put on for others' benefit.
Anyways, happy Coming Out Day to everyone, to those that are safe and able to come out today and those that can't. To those that can't, be safe and well. "Coming out" is something for your own personal benefit, not anyone else, and not the pressures of a holiday.
I feel so much better for it. It was a frustrating process and I'm glad to be on the other side of it.
I know labels aren't for everyone, but I find them comforting for myself and my identity. I need an anchor to tether me.
Bit fuzzy on the gender thing lately. The prospect of yet another lengthy journey of self-discovery just exhausts me at this point. "None gender, left female" kinda started as a joke but that feels more right than wrong. So does "agender" and so does "demigirl."
Not sure how much of my gender presentation is tangled up with having to present uncomfortably femme at work, overall societal pressures, my hormone imbalance, and who I actually am as a person deep down.
It increasingly feels like a costume I put on for others' benefit.
Anyways, happy Coming Out Day to everyone, to those that are safe and able to come out today and those that can't. To those that can't, be safe and well. "Coming out" is something for your own personal benefit, not anyone else, and not the pressures of a holiday.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-12 02:04 am (UTC)It's hard to untangle stuff like this when there are such high stakes looming overhead, but it's such a relief to figure things out, or at least to stumble closer to an answer step by step. And to find other people like you.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-12 04:38 am (UTC)Zelda- Please accept my wishes that some day you will only have to wear costumes for your own enjoyment.