Alert: Annoying Angst is Annoying

[aunt_zelda]

As if it wasn't bad enough that JesuOtaku made that comment that she thought being gay was a "lifestyle choice" about a year ago on her formspring, it seems that a lot of people have just now found out about that and it's caused angst on the TGWTG Secrets Tumblr. 

"It's not true!" "It is true!" "Where did you get your information?" "Stop talking about this and move on."

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhh!

Well, it is true, maybe her opinion has changed since then but she said what she said on her formspring and now it's come back to haunt her. As such comments should! Also, why can't I find the link to that formspring page? I know I had it at one point, I remember reading it, I made an LJ post about it last February and everything.
And I don't feel sorry for her that this has been dredged up again. She needs to be reminded that what she said upset people, because apparently she didn't realize.
Personally, I haven't felt comfortable watching her even in crossovers since I read that comment last year, and I haven't watched any of her stand-alone vids since I found out (with the exception of one, just the once.) You can't say stuff like that online and not expect people to be a little (or a LOT) upset with you.
At this point, I feel like she should apologize or issue some kind of statement, because people are confused and upset. (Maybe her opinion has in fact changed! Sure would be nice to hear that from her.) Or she could just ignore this and get used to taking the kind of flak that comes with having made an unfortunate comment in the past.

Whatever happens, I wish people would stop upsetting poor Rants. I've only known about that tumblr for like a week and already I have the biggest soft spot for him. I want to ask my mom to send him cookies (she makes awesome cookies, I can't bake to save my life) if shipping cookies to the UK would 1) end with still-tasty cookies arriving and 2) wasn't supremely creepy. 

At the very least, I wanna go give Rants a hug. Nobody deserves to be grappling with this level of angst about fandom stuff, especially not such a nice, hardworking, funny guy like him.

Comments

[emeriin.livejournal.com]

I got pissed off at that too, especially "fans" blaming Rants for "lack of quality control". But! While her and Nash have been all "eww, that tumblr skeeves me out", the rest have proven awesome and are making up their own secrets. Tis hilarious. <3

And speaking of gay issues, http://www.facebook.com/pages/Doug-Walker/127127037353766?v=wall#!/permalink.php?story_fbid=238407922900204&id=127127037353766 <- made me cry happy tears.

[aunt-zelda.livejournal.com]

Considering the stuff that goes on at fandomsecrets (haven't been there in ages) why is it Rants' job to investigate every little fact? Rants posts the secrets and people discuss them. It is not Rants fault if some people didn't know that JO called being gay a "lifestyle choice" a year ago on her formspring. It's not Rants fault that JO never really brought that up again. It's certainly not Rants' fault if people are upset that JO said that. It's JO's fault, she said it, and people are not happy about it, and poor Rants got caught up in a shitstorm as a result. I like her less and less.

And speaking of gay issues, http://www.facebook.com/pages/Doug-Walker/127127037353766?v=wall#!/permalink.php?story_fbid=238407922900204&id=127127037353766 <- made me cry happy tears.
Oh god, me too! ILU Doug! You're an amazing, wonderful man and that post made me so damn happy I did a happy dance!

[cysfics.livejournal.com]

The Formspring question was deleted, I think. It disappeared a few months ago.

She did what she did. I'm at the point where I honestly don't care anymore. People didn't believe me or told me to get over it. Fine. I don't watch her videos anymore, and that's all that matters, really.

[aunt-zelda.livejournal.com]

The Formspring question was deleted, I think. It disappeared a few months ago.
Harumph! I'm hoping she did that because she realized it was upsetting people, not because she was trying to hide evidence or whatever.

People didn't believe me or told me to get over it.
What? That's wrong, I'm so sorry ...
"Get over it?" Really? *headdesk* Yeah, sure, she didn't say "all gays must burn in hell" but she did call it a "lifestyle choice" and say it's because she's seen friends who've had difficult lives because of said "choice," which is almost worse, because people were making excuses that it's not "as bad" as her saying something else. It's still bad, it's just harder because she's not a crazy-eyed Evangelical ranting on tv that even middle-grounders are uncomfortable with.
Sure, it's because of the environment she was raised in, but she's an adult now and has the internet at her fingertips, and she's a minor internet celebrity on a big website. It's her duty to be well-informed, and common sense to be at least respectful of her audience. This isn't some factoid about her relationship with Nash or her family life, this is about who she is and whether I want to give her money by clicking "play" on her videos, so I'm a bit miffed that people are being all "you shouldn't talk about their personal lives on the blog!" It's not some intimate detail about her personal life, it's whether she believes being gay is a choice or not. Yes or no? Is it really that hard?

Fine. I don't watch her videos anymore, and that's all that matters, really.
Yeah, I watch crossovers that feature her, but not her videos. I miss them, but until I hear for sure that she's done some research and changed her mind, I can't in good conscious support her videos.

[cysfics.livejournal.com]

I appreciate the sympathy. Thankee.

I was actually talking to my boyfriend about this today - she's apparently talked to queer people (Diamanda Hagan, Omega, Cin Wicked) and apologized. I think she should make a public apology, but again - I really, really don't care. I've got a given amount of energy, and I'm not squandering it on her.

[aunt-zelda.livejournal.com]

I wish I could send you a basket of cookies. My mom makes excellent cookies, and you've been a great friend, and you totally deserve delicious cookies, because you are so awesome.

I was actually talking to my boyfriend about this today - she's apparently talked to queer people (Diamanda Hagan, Omega, Cin Wicked) and apologized.
She did? GOOD!
What about the fans, though? You know, us, her audience? It's all very well to apologize to the people onstage who've been acting alongside you, but you need to speak to the giant audience who was watching the whole time as well.

I think she should make a public apology
Yes, yes she should. This angst-fest should have demonstrated that to her. Instead she acted all offended that people were upset that she said something awful last year and they just now found out about it. *sarcasm* Nooooooo, really? People are upset that you called being gay a "lifestyle choice?" What madness is this? How unreasonable! Shut down the tumblr! *end sarcasm*

but again - I really, really don't care. I've got a given amount of energy, and I'm not squandering it on her.
I'm not gonna make a huge deal out of this, this is about as far as I wanted to take it, posting to my LJ and rolling my eyes. And until I hear an apology or at least a proper acknowledgement, I'm not watching any of her videos. Crossovers featuring her, yes, WTFIWWY, yes (I love Tara) but not her stand-alone vids. It's a little bit, but it's all I want to do.

[achika-chan.livejournal.com]

I like how it's obvious that Lewis sent the letter to Rants. Rants really didn't do a good job blacking out his name LOL. Anyway, my whole two cents about the entire situation is that Rants needs to let someone else take the reins, because he seems like a nice guy but not like someone who's equipped to run a Secrets comm, especially in this fandom.

[aunt-zelda.livejournal.com]

Yeah, Rants is nice and funny but he doesn't seem very confident in himself, and with all the personal feelings getting thrown around in secrets and reactions that seems to be hurting him.

I find it very painful to watch someone go through the "zomg The-Powers-That-Be can see me!" that this fandom goes through every once in a while ... but it's just him, not him with a big group of friends "hiding in a secret treehouse" as we used to say. Like, like when someone in the Treehouse has their fanfic mentioned or read in a vid and they freak out and we all descend with hugs and comfort and support and by the end we're all laughing and making Kink Meme prompts, or at least all down from panic attacks. Rants doesn't seem to have that kind of support system, and that makes me sad.

[lit-wolf.livejournal.com]

I agree 100% with your post! I feel sorry that Rants got dragged into the middle of it all but I think it's really unfair that JO hid behind Nash and all the other reviewers, who all immediately jumped to her defense. She deleted the original post but I too read it and, as someone who has gay friends and supports them whole-heartily, I was pissed about what she said.

And there's that whole 'it's her personal buisness' excuse. BULLSHIT! She posted it publicly on the Internet! It's free game! And as a Internet celebrity, she should have to deal with it, just like film and music celebrities deal with their own statements being used against them. If she's revised her original opinion, whether of her own free will or because of the fan backlash, then more power to her but that doesn't make the original statement go away entirely.

Really, when I heard that the reviewers were iffy about the Secrets group, and that Rants was willing to shut it down if they asked, I got pissed. If you put yourself out there on the Internet for all to see, you should expect some backlash and some stuff that might make you uncomfortable. It's the same feeling I get when published authors forbid fanfiction or fanart.

Now I do still watch her stuff and I just do my best to put her views out of my head. It's something I've often had to do with authors or actors; I have to set aside the creator to enjoy their work. I'd actually done a really good job of forgetting about her comment until the TGWTG Secrets group brought it up. Now it will probably be a while before I can stomach watching her again.

[aunt-zelda.livejournal.com]

I agree 100% with your post!
I just had to put my two cents out there. I was mad, and I am still kinda mad.

I feel sorry that Rants got dragged into the middle of it all but I think it's really unfair that JO hid behind Nash and all the other reviewers, who all immediately jumped to her defense.
1) Poor Rants! He needs hugs! Can we like adopt him into the Treehouse and be his support system or something? Is there like a way to adopt someone in fandom-terms? I know I got fandom-married a couple of years ago, surely there's precedent for fandom-adoption? *is kidding ... mostly*
2) JO's behavior about this is ... disconcerting. She could have easily said "yeah, I did say that, here's the link" to quash the "it's not true/it is true" debate. She could have APOLOGIZED to her audience. She could have said that her mindset has changed since then and she made that post a year ago. She did none of those things. She called a blog run by fans, for fans, about tgwtg.com "skeezy."

She deleted the original post but I too read it and, as someone who has gay friends and supports them whole-heartily, I was pissed about what she said.
It bothers me that she deleted that.

And there's that whole 'it's her personal buisness' excuse. BULLSHIT! She posted it publicly on the Internet! It's free game! And as a Internet celebrity, she should have to deal with it, just like film and music celebrities deal with their own statements being used against them. If she's revised her original opinion, whether of her own free will or because of the fan backlash, then more power to her but that doesn't make the original statement go away entirely.
Yeah, it's not details about her sex life or her family or her health, it's the fact that she posted ONLINE in response to a question BY A FAN, on a public forum, that she thinks being gay is "lifestyle choice."

Really, when I heard that the reviewers were iffy about the Secrets group, and that Rants was willing to shut it down if they asked, I got pissed. If you put yourself out there on the Internet for all to see, you should expect some backlash and some stuff that might make you uncomfortable. It's the same feeling I get when published authors forbid fanfiction or fanart.
THAT scared me. I was like "wait, what? Are you gonna get tgwtg stuff banned from fandomsecrets on LJ too? Are you gonna come after the Treehouse? Just because someone said they were upset that JO called being gay a "choice?" ... and she DID do that?" They have a huge audience, people are going to have many different opinions and reactions, yes we're a lot closer than most fandoms and their subject-of-fanning, but there's still a line there somewhere.

Still not gonna watch her videos, and still gonna feel guilty when I watch crossovers with her in them.

[lit-wolf.livejournal.com]

'It bothers me that she deleted that.'
I can't say for certain that she deleted it but I searched for it and couldn't find the post so that's my guess. Especially when the letter posted on the blog sent a link, not to the original post like it claimed, but to one of her defensive posts that sounded slightly better than her original response.

And I have to say that if the Secrets blog is shut down, whether by the choice of Rants or by pressure from the reviewers, I will be sorely tempted to get an account and start the group up again, with no censorship whatsoever.

Now I am a huge TGWTG fan. I love the site, I love the reviewers, I love their work, I love the fandom, I love everything. If I hear people online talking bad about the site or a reviewer, I'm one of the first to jump to their defense. But to start censoring stuff, especially when JO's original post is very true (not like the TGWTG Secrets blog keeps saying), leaves a bad taste in my mouth. It's one thing for Nash to ask for no romantic fic or something like that; it's quite another to do... well, something like what just happened on the blog.

But I'm trying to let the situation go so I can go back to enjoying videos. Not any of JO's at this point in time but the numerous others on the site.