So I got a little teary.
Then I went to see my old theater group. Who are basically a second-family, but more than that. They've seen me grow up, and now I'm seeing the younger members grow up. Boys shooting up like weeds, girls I knew as tiny children getting boobs bigger than mine. I'm graduating college in a few weeks. I've spent ten years connected to these people in one way or another.
It's ... odd. I cried, a lot, at the play, and then at people. I got hugged a lot. People asked how I was doing, my plans, were shocked about my impending graduation and gave high-fives and insisted I couldn't be graduating already because it couldn't have been four years already. A guy I consider practically a big brother hugged me so hard my back cracked. An actor I really respect whom I've known for about ten years told me he was so pleased to see me again. People reminded me that I can always come back to them. One of my mentors told me he was proud of me. I started crying.
Overwhelmed with emotions and now drained. Watching Shakespeare stuff to recharge.
Or write fanfic.
And now my new computer doesn't have Word on it. So when I wanna update stuff I need to switch to my old (slow) computer. Until I save up to buy a version of Word. So updates will be ... slow.
That feeling when a professor tells you during a meeting "I don't usually give out A's" and GIVES YOU AN A.
NOT AN A MINUS. AN A!!! : DDDDD
Bonus points: television writing class.
Super bonus points: he said my outline read like a professional outline.
Super awesome bonus points: he said he showed my cold open to a colleague because of how great it felt to read good assigned work.
Excuse me while I do the Dance of Joy.
So much cuddling. Several breaks. Non-extended editions because that's all we had on hand.
We had great fun reliving our pre-teen crushes. (Aragorn for me, Eowyn for him.)
We started yelling out stuff for a potential drinking game, but did not actually play a drinking game. (Examples: "Come and visit New Zealand" when there are gorgeous shots of the countryside, Sam and Frodo yelling each other's names, instances where women fighting would have been helpful.)( Read more... )
But I don't wanna.
I wanna watch tv with my mom and eat awesome food.
I feel down all of the sudden. Which is odd, because everything's going well, I went on a long walk by the frozen lake with my mom. I feel good about my future for the first time since I was busy figuring out which college to attend.
I just wanna cuddle with my mom and watch tv. I've missed her so much.
Must be the end-of-year stuff making me feel like this. Time to watch some internet reviewers and cheer myself up.
So my eyes hurt all day pretty much. I looked in a mirror closely just now: bloodshot. WTF. I guess I didn't get nearly enough sleep at ALL last night. Which I like, knew, but I've never had my eyes do this before. Wow.
Also in my final class we got to show off samples of our work. Short films and clips of bigger films. It was very nice and relaxing. Then the professor showed us a hilarious and then poignant video that made me laugh so hard I cried and couldn't breathe, and that really amused the professor. She said she'd never gotten that kind of reaction before. And then we were all weepy about the end of class saying goodbyes and such. Most of the class is graduating this week, like right now. I'm graduating in the spring. But it's ... very emotional and big.
I still have bits of one final left to do, but it'll be done by tomorrow night. It has to be. I'm leaving on my road trip Friday afternoon.
This morning we FB messaged over breakfast because I wanted to make sure he'd contributed to the Nosferatu Kickstarter in my name as a Christmas present, which he had. And we chatted really quick before I had to eat my eggs and leave.
On the ride in I listened to the Awesome Mix Vol. 1 playlist, which just brought up thoughts of this summer, and seeing Guardians of the Galaxy with my boyfriend, twice.
I miss him. Which is ... wow.
That's a big deal. I've never felt this way about someone before.
We spent the whole summer together in that tiny apartment. Got sick of each other in the initial weeks before I started going to the park to read sometimes.
And now we've been apart for ages and ... I think it's been good for me. Which sounds weird but, I'm remembering all the stuff I love about him, how much I love having him around, being with him. How much I can't wait to be back living with him, being all domestic and silly and almost-adults.
And the thought that in a few months, I'm moving out to LA, across the country, to move into a place with him and two of our friends ... that's not scary at all to me. That's comforting. That's exciting. That makes me so, so happy.
So ... yeah. That's where I'm at.