Halloween

Oct. 31st, 2015 02:29 pm
aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

I was gonna work an 8.5 hour shift dressed as Kevin from Welcome to Night Vale.

Instead I spent the night coughing, stressed, unable to sleep. Finally my roommates convinced me to call in sick. I did. I’m nervous about whether I’ll get in trouble for this, calling out of an 8.5 hour shift on a holiday on a Saturday. But I couldn’t have done it, and I would have gotten little kids sick from coughing on their groceries, so I made the right decision.

Gonna spend the day in bed, resting up, and working on my freelance job (which pays more than my other job anyways.) And thankfully I have three days in a row off of work, so hopefully I’ll get through the worst of this cold/cough thing by then.

aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

  • My job

  • My relationship

  • My friendships

  • My housing arrangements

  • My fanfic obligations and by extension my close fandom friendships of many years

And I have an 8.5 hour shift tomorrow at work.

Once I get home tomorrow night I’m gonna watch Man from UNCLE and turn off all social media. There might be whiskey involved. There will certainly be ice cream involved. I will be ok, but right now I am not ok.

aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

I know all my favorites are going to migrate to new platforms, but still, this announcement made me feel panicky.

I’m worried about those who won’t feel motivated to migrate to new servers.

And I’m annoyed/sad that now the dates will be all messed up. It’s been fun going to old videos and seeing that they were uploaded in like, June 2012 or February 2013, remembering where I was when I first watched this crossover or that one.
I hope that the reuploads to new servers include a tag that mentions when they were originally posted, for history’s sake.

4th of July

Jul. 4th, 2015 09:47 am
aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)
I will not be going out to do anything 4th of July related because for some reason, my family has a curse with the 4th of July. If we try to do things on the 4th of July, it does not end well. Highlights include: our car breaking down and stranding us well past midnight trying to get back and forth with the tow truck and a replacement car, fighting all the way to the fireworks and missing them, and last summer getting trapped in a tropical storm on a bridge with my boyfriend.
For several summers I would take a work shift on the 4th, since so many of my coworkers wanted it off to be with their families. And that suited me just fine. It's just when I try and go out to do something 4th of July related that bad stuff happens. I do not know why.

Today

Jun. 19th, 2015 06:53 pm
aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

Slept in way too late: whoops.

Ate an actual breakfast at a decent hour: good.

Found story ideas from five years ago: holy shit this is actually great I can use this for a tv script!

Marathoned Jim Henson’s Creature Shop: AWESOMESAUCE THESE CUTIES OMG SO CUTE AND FANTASTIC, EVEN BETTER THAN FACE/OFF SOMEHOW AWWWWWWW

Outlined a spec script on my massive white board: FUCK YES I AM AN ADULT BEING PRODUCTIVE WOOT LOOK AT THIS BOARD I AM SO HAPPY AND ORGANIZED

Got three confirmations of informational interviews: YAY! *MASSIVE RELIEF*

Lost potential third roommate: goddammit.

Did not swim: it’s ok I swam yesterday.

Overall: good day but I need to do more. Gonna watch tv with the housemate later, and make more plans.

aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

Today my housemate and I conquered one of adulthood's greatest challenges: IKEA!
I'd never been before.

We escaped with everything we needed (primarily, a couch/bed thing) and while struggling to cram it into the car a nice Chinese family who spoke very little English came up to us and helped us shove it inside the car.
And then we assembled it at home, with like no stress at all! NO TEARS! : DDD
I even had to do a minor repair on the metal bit where a machine made an error, with the aid of my toolbox I fixed it! HAH!

And I swam AGAIN. I've never held to an exercise regime before, and I am now, which continues to astound me.

We have a couch bed. I'm so happy. I'm an adult!



Seriously, this is ... really cool.




Road Trip!

May. 24th, 2015 09:02 pm
aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)
About to leave on another cross-country road trip! So excited! Been waiting for this ever since I got back from the last one in December.
I'll post pictures when I can. Internet usage will be sporadic for the next week or so.
aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)
Her name is [livejournal.com profile] teenybuffalo and she is wonderful. I’m moving cross country away from her because I’m graduating and I’m crying now so I wanna ramble.

Posted to my tumblr because there are photos I don't wanna upload again to a different social network site.

~linky link~

whoooo

Apr. 23rd, 2015 03:04 pm
aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

Mild panic attack when I couldn’t find my planner. It wasn’t anywhere. I NEVER LOSE THINGS. I thought someone had stolen it. It was a horrible, horrifying feeling. I could barely think. I almost started crying in front of a stranger.

Finally worked it out, figured out where it was. Nerves still singing. Breath still tense. Still feel like crying.

Can't shake that helpless feeling.

aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)
Went home for the weekend. Saw my old school, which was hosting an auction, my old advisor and one of my oldest longtime friends, who was a friend by necessity. We're both gradutating soon. We graduated high school together, that high school. Well, we were there for six years, it was a middle-high school.

So I got a little teary.

Then I went to see my old theater group. Who are basically a second-family, but more than that. They've seen me grow up, and now I'm seeing the younger members grow up. Boys shooting up like weeds, girls I knew as tiny children getting boobs bigger than mine. I'm graduating college in a few weeks. I've spent ten years connected to these people in one way or another.

It's ... odd. I cried, a lot, at the play, and then at people. I got hugged a lot. People asked how I was doing, my plans, were shocked about my impending graduation and gave high-fives and insisted I couldn't be graduating already because it couldn't have been four years already. A guy I consider practically a big brother hugged me so hard my back cracked. An actor I really respect whom I've known for about ten years told me he was so pleased to see me again. People reminded me that I can always come back to them. One of my mentors told me he was proud of me. I started crying.

Overwhelmed with emotions and now drained. Watching Shakespeare stuff to recharge. 
aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)
I got a new computer over the weekend, the transfer process ran into some issues. I was without a computer for several days. I apologize for my absense online. It was incredibly stressful for me, I am involved in many projects currently and I couldn't keep in contact with the THREE FILMS I am producing at the moment and all the class projects.

Or write fanfic.

And now my new computer doesn't have Word on it. So when I wanna update stuff I need to switch to my old (slow) computer. Until I save up to buy a version of Word. So updates will be ... slow.
aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

That feeling when a professor tells you during a meeting "I don't usually give out A's" and GIVES YOU AN A.

NOT AN A MINUS. AN A!!! : DDDDD

Bonus points: television writing class.

Super bonus points: he said my outline read like a professional outline.

Super awesome bonus points: he said he showed my cold open to a colleague because of how great it felt to read good assigned work.

Excuse me while I do the Dance of Joy.

Trying

Mar. 15th, 2015 10:32 pm
aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

Trying to distract myself from feeling sad about Sir Terry because when I found out I was sick as a dog and couldn’t properly mourn or do much of anything, like seriously standing up was a big deal that day, I have never been that sick in my life, I think it was food poisoning. And right now it’s getting tough to do productive stuff except lay around re-reading the books and hugging the books and crying and trying to do stuff and re-reading the books and crying and the cycle keeps going and being sick as a dog meant the homework I had to do over spring break didn’t get done and I have two pages left to write of the WORST excuse for an essay I have ever written it is absolute garbage but I don’t even care it’s 10:30pm and I have to wake up early tomorrow morning and it’s DUE.

Anyways, there’s a bit in The Fifth Elephant where the Igor who ends up joining the Watch is growing doodles like he’s Herbert West. Little fingers and noses on little legs.
So that’s cool. Find something new on every re-read.

I can’t even distract myself with other fandoms, everything reminds me of Discworld right now. Seriously, everything. Re-Animator. ASoIaF. Channel Awesome. Johannes Cabal. Jupiter Ascending. Everything.

I don’t know what to do.

Re-watch my favorite movies and listen to some tv show commentaries I guess, once all this homework is settled? I’ve loaded every Discworld audiobook I own onto my iPod, I’ll be cycling through those for the foreseeable future.

aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

I dunno if this is something there’s enough of a sample size to poll about, but, well, here goes.

I’ve done some podfics. Not a ton, and I have a huge list and a great microphone just waiting for more, I wanna do more, but anyways, I’ve done some podfics.

When I’m feeling anxious and nothing seems to be distracting me or helping, know what has yet to fail?

Listening to my own voice.

I feel like that must be egotistical or something. But it works.

Everyone else I’ve talked to about doing podfics LOATHES the sound of their own voice. Hell, there’s even actors who can’t watch their own movies. And yet here I am, curled up, working off an almost-anxiety-attack, listening to a recording of myself pretending to do Harry Dresden’s monologues in a fanfic.

Is this something anyone else does? I’m curious.

aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)
Presentation actually went well! NO TEARS! No overwhelming panic. I got through the whole thing and not a single attack of terror and crying.
I think this was accomplished by 1) the small classroom and class size 2) my not looking up much at all during the presentation and 3) my notes were typed up exactly how I speak, so it was like a script I was reading in my own voice (something I haven't been able to do for other presentations.)
My professor told me I did a really great job, especially since I had warned him I'd probably cry and he'd been expected a panic attack. Thank the gods, finally, I get through a big important presentation without any crying fits.
My biggest academic concern for this semester is OVER AND DONE WITH! : DDD
aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

So much cuddling. Several breaks. Non-extended editions because that's all we had on hand.

We had great fun reliving our pre-teen crushes. (Aragorn for me, Eowyn for him.)

We started yelling out stuff for a potential drinking game, but did not actually play a drinking game. (Examples: "Come and visit New Zealand" when there are gorgeous shots of the countryside, Sam and Frodo yelling each other's names, instances where women fighting would have been helpful.)

Read more... )

aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

But I don't wanna.

I wanna watch tv with my mom and eat awesome food.

I feel down all of the sudden. Which is odd, because everything's going well, I went on a long walk by the frozen lake with my mom. I feel good about my future for the first time since I was busy figuring out which college to attend.

I just wanna cuddle with my mom and watch tv. I've missed her so much.

Must be the end-of-year stuff making me feel like this. Time to watch some internet reviewers and cheer myself up.

Home

Dec. 18th, 2014 10:26 pm
aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

So good to be home.

I'm so tired.

It's so unreal being home.

My mom played music and did a silly joyful dance when I drove up. We both cried.

So happy to be home. I will make more posts later, I gotta focus on my Yuletide prompt now.

aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)

So my eyes hurt all day pretty much. I looked in a mirror closely just now: bloodshot. WTF. I guess I didn't get nearly enough sleep at ALL last night. Which I like, knew, but I've never had my eyes do this before. Wow.

Also in my final class we got to show off samples of our work. Short films and clips of bigger films. It was very nice and relaxing. Then the professor showed us a hilarious and then poignant video that made me laugh so hard I cried and couldn't breathe, and that really amused the professor. She said she'd never gotten that kind of reaction before. And then we were all weepy about the end of class saying goodbyes and such. Most of the class is graduating this week, like right now. I'm graduating in the spring. But it's ... very emotional and big.

I still have bits of one final left to do, but it'll be done by tomorrow night. It has to be. I'm leaving on my road trip Friday afternoon.

aunt_zelda: (GarlicIsTheAnswer)
Really missed my boyfriend today.

This morning we FB messaged over breakfast because I wanted to make sure he'd contributed to the Nosferatu Kickstarter in my name as a Christmas present, which he had. And we chatted really quick before I had to eat my eggs and leave.

On the ride in I listened to the Awesome Mix Vol. 1 playlist, which just brought up thoughts of this summer, and seeing Guardians of the Galaxy with my boyfriend, twice.

I miss him. Which is ... wow.
That's a big deal. I've never felt this way about someone before.

We spent the whole summer together in that tiny apartment. Got sick of each other in the initial weeks before I started going to the park to read sometimes.

And now we've been apart for ages and ... I think it's been good for me. Which sounds weird but, I'm remembering all the stuff I love about him, how much I love having him around, being with him. How much I can't wait to be back living with him, being all domestic and silly and almost-adults.

And the thought that in a few months, I'm moving out to LA, across the country, to move into a place with him and two of our friends ... that's not scary at all to me. That's comforting. That's exciting. That makes me so, so happy.

So ... yeah. That's where I'm at.  

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